Rumor has it, that with age comes wisdom, and that’s true. I feel I’ve gained the wisdom to know that I’m supposed to have wisdom, and the wisdom to know that I don’t. That’s not to say that I haven’t learned a thing or two in my trips around the block. I’ve learned that the monkey chatter in my head drowns out the beating of my heart. I’ve learned that if it doesn’t belong to you, you can’t have it, no matter how much you think you can. I’ve learned that if you aren’t willing to work for something, maybe you don’t really want it after all. I’ve learned that your dreams are not going to hand themselves to you without meeting them half way. I know all this amazing stuff I didn’t know when I was young, and yet to paraphrase my very wise friend, Gila, I have a very steep investment in ignoring all of these wonderful life lessons. I guess there is a certain amount of wisdom in knowing what we are praying for and maybe even working for. Truthfully, though, I want my dreams to walk right up to me and say, “there you are, we’ve been looking for you everywhere.” 

“Woman Praying”  carynjune

Getting older is not a whole lot different then being a child. You still want toys, security, protection, love. The only difference is, you do it with 30 extra pounds, creaky joints and flappy bits you never saw before. I’ve noticed in my case that my fears and insecurities are very much the same. I always wanted to be pretty. I mean the kind of pretty that turns heads, makes you part of the popular group. The kind of pretty you see on skincare commercials. Now I know intellectually, that even the women in those commercials aren’t as pretty as they look, but let’s face it they’re pretty darn pretty. When I was in high school, I would listen to the Beach Boys and fantasize about the boys I liked asking me out. When I was living in LA, I’d smoke cigarette after cigarette, listening to music and fantasizing about the men I liked leaving their wives or their girlfriends, (a whole ‘nother Blog…) and declaring their undying love for me. Now I’m about to be 56. Being blessed with pretty good genes, I don’t look all that different then I did back then, which is to say, I’ve looked 50ish since I was 18. But now, I have 30 extra pounds, creaky joints, and flappy bits I never saw before.

The Monster Under the Bed

Sterling Silver, Granulated, Forged, Patinaed (carynjune)